Still Counting Down 186 Days Left....

I can't believe it's been almost a full month since I've last posted in this thing. Time really is flying too fast for me to keep up with. Yet at the same time, it's not moving fast enough to allow me to play Assassin's Creed and Mass Effect...grrrrr....anyways....so yeah what can I do as far as an update? Well the past month has been pretty interesting to say nonetheless. There's been some renewed interest in the love life department as I met and hung out with Max, but that's an interesting dilemma that I'm not sure I'm ready to tackle with. True, I've been wanting someone to hang out with for quite a while now so I could get to know and develop into something more substantial than just a light night fling, but I'm realizing that this is my final year in Pembroke and after May I probably won't be back to this town for the next two to three years again. So anything and anyone that I get involved with is going to have to be real down played. Anyway....


Max showed up and and we started to hang out and he's really cool. The thing about it is this. I know I'm not like Big Kevin. He's one of those guys who thinks that just because he's gay and "straight-acting" that this fact alone should automatically land him a man. I don't think that way. I've already come to terms with the fact that my mannerisms would be considered in the middle. I'm not ultra-macho with the whole "nailing bitches...playing football" thing but yet not ultra feminine either with the "let me get my MAC on first" kinda thing. I like the freedom that I get from having a little bit of both sides. However that doesn't mean that I'll date someone that's on either end of the spectrum either. I don't think I'd date an ultra masculine guy because he'd be too much into sports, which generally don't interst me, which would mean we wouldn't have a whole lot in common, while at the same time, I don't want someone who spends eight hours in the bathroom either. Not to say that Max is one or the other, but just for me personally, having just met him, he's a bit too much on the queeny side for me. He shows up to my apartment decked out in gold hoop earrings with this ponytail bun thing looking like he just put some foundation on and it was kind of embarrassing to have him introduced to my roommates. Now if I were alone with no one else there, it wouldn't have been a big deal, but they've been harping and harping on this same fact, so I didn't know what they would think about him. And I don't know what their impressions are nor do I want to. However, it was a little bit scary for me to bring him in there. But we did have a good time and we hung out and he's funny so maybe I'm not giving it a proper chance but at this point in the game, I already asked him what he plans on doing in the next year and he's staying here and creating a business. That's not my plans cause they sure as hell don't involve Robeson County, so we're not even in the same mainstream. And then you have Jamie who's been trying to talk to me for a while but honestly I didnt't want to hurt his feelings or anything. But he's not my type. Not that I have anything against guys bigger than me, but I don't see how that would help us in the long run. If I needed you to get my chair out of the trunk and you couldn't do it, where would that put us? Looking like dumbasses. So I don't bother. So I don't know. There's this guy Jose, but that's a warning flag if I ever saw one. For one thing he's 19 (which I normally don't do either way. Too young), but he's cute so I gave him the time of day. To which he responds that he needs to borrow his sister's car to come and see me. LIES and DECEPTION. I don't have a car myself but that's because of extinginuating circumstances. There isn't a whole lot of a reason why he should be borrowing a car like that. So yeah....

That's issue A. Issue B is the ever looming closeness of this situation with Grad School. I want to go to Fashion School. I really do. But I don't want to start over again. With another four year degree. And I don't want a degree lower than the one I've got. So what do I do? I could look other places but it's San Fran. I was so highly looking forward to going there for the life and it's looking like it's slowly slipping through my fingers. I haven't given up hope yet. I'll find out more and figure something out.

Turns out VR decided to do something right for a change. Delora Jacobs, who works with Ronnie Sampson told me that they decided to actually try and help pay for rent, which would be fabulous. So I'm supposed to be meeting up with her to discuss something to work something out so I can sign up papers and get some checks....which would be great.

Man I can't wait till this semester is over and I'm chilling with Julia over in Nashville. The end of this year just can't come fast enough. And yet I know that next semester will be complete torture. I can see it coming. Complete and utter SENIORITIS....

P.S. I almost forgot to add (and I can't believe I almost did) the new Britney Spears' album is the SHIIIIIIITTTTT!!!! Man I love her! Though she's losing her damn mind, she still knows how to make kick ass music. Thank you for that Brit!